iAm Not a Nub
by SavySoCool
Summary: When Sam gets a new boyfriend, Freddie begins to morph into a new person. And what does she, Carly, and a random hobo have to say about it? Read and find out. Multi-chap!
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer- One person owns iCarly. I'm not it.**

**A/N- Hey, my peeps! You know all of those stories where Sam changes herself for Freddie? Yea…this isn't one of them. Now it's Freddie's turn to change for Sam. When she gets a new boyfriend, Freddie begins to morph into a new person. And what does Sam, Carly, and a random hobo have to say about it? Read and find out.**

**Warning- The following story contains a bunch of weirdness. Viewer discretion is advised.**

As I stare at my reflection in the mirror, I see a clean-cut teenage boy wearing a striped polo shirt, and light brown khaki's. Not a single hair out of place, nor a single wrinkle on his clothes. I sigh loudly, kicking the wall in frustration.

That's just it! The reflection I see is of Fredward Benson. Class A nerd – or at least Sam says so. But when have I ever cared what Sam Puckett thought? Oh, wait! Now I remember!

The day I fell in love with her.

I'm not going to go into this long love story about how the blonde-headed demon stole my heart. Because, to be honest, I wouldn't be able to. I didn't just wake up one day and think, "I'm in love with Sam! Yippee!" Because it didn't happen like that. It took a simple fire escape kiss, lots of denial, and her captivating blue eyes to push me over. And because of that, I began to fall. For the one and only Samantha Joy Puckett.

Shoot me now.

The day I realized this small fact was not a joyous one for me. Why, you ask? Well, I'll tell you. Jake.

Also known as: The guy who Sam fell head over heels for.

Shoot. Me. Now.

Ever since Sam announced that she and Jake were dating, I've been asking myself one thing. Why can't that be me? I mean, is it so wrong for me to want to be the one who Sam kisses, holds, and looks lovingly at?

I guess so, because I'm not that guy. And, unless I do something to win over Sam's heart, I probably never will be.

Which brings us to my current situation. If you remember correctly, I was staring hatefully at my reflection. And I still am. So, I do what any logical person would do in my situation.

Grab some hair moose, baggy pants, secretly work out for a few months, and completely change my outer appearance in hope that Sam will fall for a guy who's not really me. What could go wrong?

* * *

><p>Twenty minutes later, I strut confidently to my door. I have a new look, a new confidence, and above all, I'm a new me.<p>

"Fredward Benson! What in the name of tofu is in your hair?" I hear my mom yell at me. My eyes widen, and I quicken my pace.

"It's just hair gel!" I yell, as I race out the door. So much for my suave confidence.

I regain my composure, and knock quickly but surely on Carly's door. I hear shuffling on the inside, and the door swings open.

"Oh, it's just you. I thought you'd be- OH MY GOD, FREDDIE! WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU? YOU LOOK HOT!" Carly shrieked, taking in my appearance in shock. After realizing she was gawking, she quickly closed her mouth and blushed.

"Gee, thanks," I say, laughing at her slight blush. "Can I come in yet?" She blushes again.

"What happened?" Carly repeats, after letting me in. I casually stroll over to her kitchen, and shrug.

"Thought I needed a change," I say, opening the fridge. I grab some ham, and sit down on the couch.

"Freddie! What are you doing? That's Sam's ham!" Carly cries, trying to take the meat from me. I roll my eyes at her, and plop the pork in my mouth.

"Was Sam's ham. And, unless Sam wants to wait a week or so, I'm not givin' it back," I say, eating some more ham. Carly stares at me in utter shock.

"Do you want to die?" Carly yells in my face. I wipe the spit from my cheek, and smirk.

"And who's gonna kill me? Sam? HA!"

"Wow. When you said you wanted a change, you really meant it," Carly says, shaking her head. At that moment, Sam chooses to walk in with…him.

"What's this about changing?" Sam asks, dragging her boyfriend behind her. Nope, still can't say that without cringing.

"Hey, Samantha," I taunt, and smirk at her. She drops her boyfriend's hand, and comes over to me. She grabs my collar, and peers into my eyes.

"Do you have a deathwish, nub?" I shiver at the closeness, but remain in control nonetheless.

"Don't call me a nub, princess. It doesn't fit me anymore," I say, removing her hand from my shirt. She glares at me, slightly shocked. She now takes in my new appearance.

And she continues to do this for another 30 seconds…Yep, my new look worked.

"Close your mouth, Sam," I laugh, patting her on the head. She snaps out of her reverie, and wipes the drool from her lips. Yea, you heard me. Drool.

"That's it, Fredlame!" She yells, jumping on my back. I fall to the ground, the wind knocked out of me. But, no matter! Remember I told you I've secretly worked out? Well, time to put those results to the test.

Though it takes me a few seconds, I am eventually able to push her off me. I flip her around, making it so I'm now on top of her. She looks up at me in shock.

"Didn't see that one coming, now did ya?" I ask her cockily. She glares at me, and I shoot her a smirk in response. Much to my pleasure, we remain in this position for a while.

"Um…would you mind getting off my girlfriend?" Jake asks, interrupting our staring contest. What a jerk.

"Oh yea, sure," I say, getting up. I wait until Jake turns away, then I wink at Sam. Her eyes widen, and I smirk.

"So, who wants to go to the movies?" Carly asks, clapping her hands. I glance over at her quickly, about to say yes. But then Sam and Jake agree to go. As if I'd watch them make out in a dark theatre.

"Uh, I would, but I can't," I say quickly. "I got to go work out. You know, keep up that six-pack of mine." I look over at Sam, anxiously awaiting her response. Unfortunately, her face remains neutral.

"Okay," Carly says, slightly disappointed. "Bye Freddie!"

"See you," I nod, heading for the door. Just as I'm leaving, Carly grabs me by the arm. I turn around, and see Carly looking up at me nervously.

"Um…before you go…I want to ask you something," Carly says, fidgeting with the lace on her jacket.

"'Kay. What's up?"

"Do you…maybe…want to go on a date with me?"

Uh oh.

**A/N- Looks like Freddie caught more than just Sam's attention. But how long will he keep up his 'cool' facade? And how will Sam react to Freddie's change? Find out next time on iAm Not A Nub.**

**Remember to review. For the hobos.**


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

**Disclaimer- I don't own iCarly, but I do own this story. And the delicuous pizza I'm about to eat...Okay, there's no pizza. But how cool would that be?**

**A/N- Hiya people. Before I move on to the story, I have a few things to say.**

**1. I am so so so so so so so so so sorry I haven't updated. There are not enough so's in the world to express my sorryness (you know, if that's even a word). School had been such a pain, and, because of this, my parents decided that I can't update this story till I do all of my homework and chores. So this was my only free moment. Sorry! Again!**

**2. Thank you so much for all the reviews. Twelve for one chapter! Not only one, but the FIRST one! That is truly amazing. I really hope this story can live up to expectations. **

**3. If you do have any critisism for the story, please let me know. This story is for your entertainment, and if you're not entertained, I want to know why. I wanna be able to make the story the best it could be, and if you want to crtitique the way I did something, I really want to know what I could do to make it better. Remember, this story is for you!**

**Now, on to the story!**

* * *

><p>"Do you…maybe…want to go on a date with me?" Carly asks quickly. I look back at her, my eyes the size of saucers.<p>

"Wait…what?" I ask stupidly, staring at her. This must be a joke. "Oh, I get it! I'm being Punked! Alright guys, the joke is over. Where are the cameras?" I look around, and smirk plastered on my lips. I see the confusion on Carly's face.

"Does he do this every time a girl asks him out?" I hear Jake whisper to Sam. I glare at him, insulted.

"Wait…so you were serious?" I ask Carly, looking back at her. She nods meekly and gives me a hopeful smile.

"Oh…um…can I talk to you in the hall for a second?" I ask her, motioning to the door. She nods quickly and walks out, with me trailing behind her.

"So, what did you want to talk about?"

"Okay…so the truth is," I start, preparing to let her down easy. I shift my weight from one foot to another. "Well…I kind of… don't have a crush on you anymore."

I don't dare look up – I'm too afraid of Carly's reaction.

"Well, this is unexpected," I hear Carly say. But there was one thing missing from her tone of voice : heartbreak. I peek at her face, and see that not only is she NOT sad, but she's smiling!

"Um…why aren't you heartbroken?" I say, staring at her in disbelief. She smirks at me, chuckling slightly.

"I don't actually know… I think that I got caught up in your change. I mean, you actually are looking and acting cool! I was in shock!" Carly exclaimed, throwing her hands up for emphasis.

"What's the supposed to mean?" I say, pretending to be insulted. "I'll have you know I was da bomb before!"

"See! Cool people don't normally say 'Da Bomb'," Carly tells me, shaking her head. I laugh at the small joke, but I'm mainly happy that Carly is still my friend.

"Okay, so if we're done insulting Freddie, let's move on. I have an important question for you," I tell her, getting serious again. She nods, signaling me to continue.

"Will you fake date me to make someone jealous?" I ask hopefully, giving her my best puppy dog look. Oh, wait! Puppies aren't manly… I gave her my best 'bulldog' face.

"Um...will you stop growling? It's kind of creeping me out…" Carly asks, backing away. Okay, maybe the bulldog face doesn't work so good…

"Oh, sure. Now, will you?" I ask. She pauses for a long time, rolling the situation over. "I mean, if your still not over my hot physique, I understand."

"Woah, woah, woah. Don't get conceited on me now. Besides, you don't have a 'hot' physique," Carly says. I give her my most offended look, which she ignores.

"Come on, will you help me or not?" I ask, getting exasperated at her constant subject-changing. She looks at me, pretending to think again.

"Hmm…"

"Just please help me make Sam jealous! I'll buy you a cookie!" I say, throwing my hands up in the air.

"Okay, first of all, you can't bribe me with a cookie. I'm not two…or Sam. And second…YOU WANT TO MAKE SAM JEALOUS?" Carly yells in my face. My eyes widen, and I quickly put my hands over he mouth.

"Be quiet! Sam will hear you!" I cry, my hand still over her mouth. She licks my hands, and I pull it away in disgust. "Eww, Carly. I just sanitized my hand!"

"Who cares! Why didn't you tell me you like Sam?"

"Um…well you see… I don't actually like her. This is all a big misunderstanding. I didn't say Sam, I said Ham! Yea, that's right. I have a crush on…Ham." I say quickly, hoping she bought it.

"Didn't I already explain to you I'm not two. I won't fall for your lies," Carly states, rolling her eyes. "Especially if they're as bad as that. Ham? Seriously?"

"I'm not lying! Ham is the…uh… exchange student from Turkey!"

"Oh, why didn't you just say so?" Carly says, pretending to buy it. I smile in victory, and prepare to do a 'manly' victory dance. But then Carly thumps me on the forehead. "Do you really think I'm that dumb?"

"Well," I start, pretending to mull it over. Carly thumps me on the forehead again.

"And to think I'm going to help you make Sam jealous," Carly says.

"Wait? You're gonna help me?" I ask hopefully, to which she nods. "SWEET!"

"On one condition," Carly interrupts me, causing my smile to drop. "We don't hurt Jake. He's a sweet guy, and I don't want him to get heartbroken."

"Aww, can't we just let him suffer?" I plead, clasping my hands together. She stares at me pointedely, and I sigh. "Fine, I promise not to break his heart…much."

"Freddie," Carly, starts warningly. I groan loudly.

"Fine. I won't break his heart at all. I may even get him a new girlfriend."

"That's all I ask." Carly states, nodding her head.

"So we have a deal?"

"Totally," Carly laughs, shaking my hand. I don't let go of her hand, and we both walk into the Shay's living room.

"What took you two so long," Sam asks, pretending to be uninterested. She looks over at us, and notices our conjoined hands.

"Well, let's just say me and Carly aren't single anymore," I say suavely, regaining my 'cool' façade. Sam's face drops for a second, but then she puts on her neutral face again.

"Great job, man. Carly's hot!" Jake congratulates, coming over and patting me on the back. Sam coughs, and Jake looks back over at his girlfriend. "But not as hot as Sam!"

"Ahem," Carly fake-coughs, causing Jake to once again look at her. He quickly looks back at Sam, then again at Carly.

"I can't win," Jake says, looking down.

"That's because you aren't as cool as me," I say smugly, sitting on the couch. Sam throws a muffin at me. "Ow! Sam that- I mean…muffins are cool."

Sam stares at me in confusion, so I pick up the muffin that pelted me in the face, and take a bite of it.

"Yum."

* * *

><p><strong>AN- Hate it? Love it? Don't care? Tell me!**


	3. Chapter 3

iAm Not a Nub- Chapter 3

**Disclaimer- I'm 13 years old and write fanfiction because I have nothing better to do. Do you think I own iCarly?**

**A/N- Hello, people of Mars! Oh, wait...wrong planet! Hello, people of Earth. You've tuned into the third chapter of iAm Not a Nub! The only story that gives you both education value, and an unlimited supply of cookies. Oh, wait...this story doesn't do that. Well, sucks for you.**

**Anyway, back to the story. You remember that warning I gave you in the first chapter? I said my story is full of weirdness. And today, you are going to get a nice, long whiff of that. You've been warned...**

"So, how was your first date with Carly?" Jake asks me. I glance away from the TV, and look over at him. He has his feet propped up lazily on the coffee table, and is sipping some Wahoo Punch.

"Eh, we haven't exactly gone on a date yet," I reply. I see his feature's scrunch up in confusion at my statement.

"But I thought you two were going out?" He asks me, taking another sip of his drink.

"We are, but…I really don't know what to do for the date," I say, turning back to the TV. The truth is, I'm actually kind of dreading my first date with Carly. I mean, don't get me wrong, I like Carly as a friend, but I'd much rather be going out with someone else.

"Dude, it's not rocket science. You ask her out, go somewhere, and after that, hope you get some smooching time!" Jake winks, as he begins to nudge me.

"Oh, and what makes you the expert on dates? I have experience in the whole 'dating' game too, you know!"

"You're kidding me, right?" He asks, looking over at me in disbelief. "You see this face? It's the kind of face girls want. You see the jaw line? It's perfect!" He proclaims, and then strikes a model pose. "Now look at my hair! Do you know how long it takes me to get it this good? It's silky, smooth, and flows perfectly. Feel it! Feel the silkiness!"

He sticks his head in my face, and orders me to feel his hair. I awkwardly shove him away. "I'd rather not."

"Your loss, dude," he says, and begins to watch TV again.

"I'll live," I say, and stand up. I say good-bye and begin to head over to my apartment. Just as I'm opening the door, a rush of blonde ringlets smothers my face and knocks me over.

"Mrphwah!" I protest, as go down, hitting the floor. The wind is knocked out of me, and I try desperately to breathe. I suddenly inhale the beautiful scent of strawberries, and begin to get lost in the amazing smell.

"What in the name of chizz are you doing, dorkwad?" Sam's voice says, snapping me out of my reverie. I realized what I was doing, and mentally scold myself. This is not the time to be getting high off Sam's scent!

I scramble up, and try to keep my dignity intact. "N-Nothing. Just…uh…HEY LOOK! THERE'S RYAN SEACREST!" I lie, trying to distract Sam.

"Where?" I hear Jake yell, looking around frantically. Sam, on the other hand, just looks at me in annoyance.

"Do you really think I'm that stupid, Freddork?" She asks me, crossing her arms.

"No, I guess not… LOOK! IT'S THE WORLD'S FATTEST PRIEST!" I yell in a last attempt to escape.

"NO WAY! WHERE?" Sam screams, turning around. I smirk, and quickly leave the apartment.

"Work's every time," I chuckle, walking into my house. Glancing at the clock, I notice it's already past nine o'clock at night. I put on my pajamas, and lay down in my bed. A few minute's later, I'm fast asleep.

SFSFSFSFSFS

_I'm walking down the hallway at Ridgeway High School, trying to balance all of my books in my hands. As I round the corner, I spot my locker, and begin to pick up my pace. 10 feet…7 feet…3 feet…Almost there!_

_BAM! A figure runs into me, and I go down. My books fly up into the air, and I watch in horror as all my AP textbooks begin to fall. _

"_Nooooooo!" I cry dramatically, flailing my arms uselessly. What's weird is that my books seem to be falling in slow motion. I glance at my watch, starting to get annoyed with the slow pace at which they're dropping. I stand up, and walk over to the water fountain, taking a nice long sip. When I come back, I notice they are still falling._

_Suddenly, the figure that ran into me stands up, and grab's the books mid-air._

"_My hero!" I cry girlishly, and run over to the mysterious person. Their back is turned to me, but I use my amazing detective skills to deduct who they are. I'd recognize those blonde curls anywhere! "SAM!"_

_Suddenly, the light's turn dark. Despite the fact that a few seconds ago we were in a school surrounded by a lot of students on a bright, sunny day, I see lightning flash._

_The figure begins to turn slowly. Even though I work out every day and I was a man the last time I checked, I cower fearfully._

_Before I know it, the figure had turned completely, and I finally got a look at their face. _

"_No!" I yell, recognizing them immediately._

"_Oh, yes! It's me Jake!" The figure yells, and begins to laugh maniacally. "You will never be Sam's boyfriend!"_

"_Why?" I cry, and watch as Jake smirks._

"_Because your hair isn't as silky as mine!"_

SFSFSFSFSFS

I wake up, drenched in sweat. The first thought that pops up into my head is, "_Well, that was weird."_

**A/N- I bet you are all thinking the same thing as Freddie. Don't deny it!**

**But even if you are, I still want to know! So tell me your thoughts in a review! Pwetty Pwease?**


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer- iDon't Own iCarly.**

**A/N- Here is the next chapter. Let me just apologize ahead of time for it. It's just a quick filler, seeing as I didn't have much time to write this. But the next chapter will be more action packed!**

Today was the day. The day for what, you ask? Well, my first date with Carly, of course! Instead of going on a 'normal' date, we've decided to go somewhere Sam really wants to go: The All-You-Can-Eat Meat Buffet! Once she sees what she's missing out on, she'll definitely want to be my girlfriend!

But before that can happen, I have to get ready for my date. I walk over to my closet and throw on a pair of black slacks, and a simple white dress shirt. Over it, I wear a dark vest and striped tie. Since I'm not a girl, I'm not going to go into a giant description of how the clothes fit my 'curves' perfectly. But let me tell you, I look pretty hot right now…

With that thought in mind, I head for Carly's house. Since the Shay's are the closest thing to a normal family I have, I don't bother knocking.

"Anyone home?" I call out, not a single Shay in sight (try saying that 5 times fast). No one responds right away, so I decide to sit on the couch and wait. I plop onto the cushions and sink in contently. Closing my eyes for a second, I begin to relax.

"Hello , Freddie," I hear Spencer say. I peek open one eye, and am surprised to see Spencer sitting across from me, clutching a stuffed bunny.

"Um, hey Spence…What'cha got there?" I ask skeptically, referring to the toy. You never can tell what's going on in Spencer's mind.

"Oh, just my pet bunny named Rabbit," Spencer replies, and begins to stroke the bunny's fur. I raise an eyebrow at the strange behavior, but shrug it off.

"What I meant was, why do you have a stuffed animal with you?" I ask, and Spencer's eyes widen.

"Shh! He doesn't like to be called stuffed! It hurts his ego!" Spencer cries, and begins to whisper comforting things into the animal's synthetic fur.

"But he's just a toy!" I say, beginning to get exasperated. Spencer glares at me, cuddling the bunny. I put my hands up in defeat, shrinking away. "Fine, fine. Why do you have a REAL animal with you?"

"It adds to the effect!" Spencer yells, shoving the animal in my face. I push it back gently, still weirded out by Spencer's actions.

"Okay...So, uh…is Carly ready for the date?" I ask, trying to steer the conversation away.

"Nope. It's just you and me," Spencer says, staring at me creepily. I scoot farther away from him, beginning to get a little scared. "So I hear you want to date my little sister. Is that correct?"

"Um…yes."

"While that's just fine and dandy," Spencer begins, still petting the stuffed animal. "I think we need to set a few things straight."

"Okay…What's on your mind?"

"What are your intentions with my sister?" Spencer asks threateningly, pointing an accusing finger at me. I jump back, startled at his sudden change of attitude.

"N-Nothing!" I yell, cowering in fear.

"Oh, so you're just going to date her once and then ditch her?" Spencer cries, shaking the bunny in my face. "Is this a date-and-ditch?"

"No! I promise not to date-and-ditch your sister!"

"Then what are your intentions with her?" Spencer asks calmly. I'm beginning to wonder in ol' Spence is bipolar.

"To date her?" I respond, but it comes out as more of a question.

"So if I let you date her, do you promise to cherish and respect her?" he asks. Gosh, he's making it sound as if we're getting married!

"Til death do us part!" I joke, trying to ease the mood.

"Oh, so you plan on killing her?" Spencer asks, jumping into his psycho mode again.

"What? NO!" I cry, trying to defend myself.

"That's good. Because we wouldn't want anything to happen to you," Spencer smirks, peering into my eyes.

"N-N-No we wouldn't," I stutter, scooting farther away from him.

"I'm glad we've had this talk, Freddie," Spencer says, getting up. He skips to his room happily, acting as if he didn't just threaten my life.

I sit back, leaning my head into the couch. Still a bit on edge, I try to relax my muscles.

"Hey, Freddie!"

"AHHHHH!" I cry, jumping 10 feet into the air. I turn around to see a wide-eyed Carly staring back at me. "What is with you Shay's and creeping up on people?"

"I'm sorry?" Carly asks, staring back at me.

"You should be!" I cry dramatically, crossing my arms.

"Yea…So, you ready for the date?" Carly asks me, changing the subject.

"Yep. Let's go!" I take Carly's hand, and we walk out of the apartment. We casually stroll to the elevator and wait patiently. When the doors open, I'm met with a horrible sight: Sam and Jake kissing.

Oh, this night just keeps on getting better and better.

**A/N- Again, I'm sorry for the lame-ness of this chapter. But, as I said before, the next chapter will (hopefully...) be better. Thanks for reading! Bye!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer- Owning iCarly would make me rich and famous. Owning this story gives me 3 dollars and I'm still pretty unknown. Aw, well!**

**A/N- What's up, people! First of all, I'm sorry for the 2 week wait. I really hate how much homework my teachers give me. It's like they all have a meeting once a week and discuss how they can make my life miserable. But nonetheless, I have the story today! This will be kinda deja vu-ish of the moment in iKiss. You know, minus the kiss...**

I have a riddle for you: What is cold, wet, and chewing on a chicken wing?

A depressed 17 year old boy sitting on a beaten up lawn chair. So, in other words…me.

I bet you're wondering what happened after my horrific witnessing of Sam and Jake chewing on each other's faces. Well, it's kind of a long story…

I screamed, grabbed some chicken, and came to the fire escape.

Okay, so maybe it's not that long of a story. But it is pretty depressing. Especially since my wing is all soggy now.

"Why must my life be so messed up?" I ask myself quietly, closing my eyes.

"Because you're a dork," I hear someone say. I turn around quickly, and see Sam standing in the window. She smirks at me, and I can't help but smile in return. "Can I come out?"

"Mi fire escape es su fire escape," I say, gesturing for her to come. She rolls her eyes, and steps out onto the balcony, instantly getting drenched. But she doesn't seem to mind. "Chicken wing?" I ask, holding out the soaked meat. "It's a little…wet."

"No der, dork," she laughs, taking the meat and stuffing it in her mouth. That's the Sam I know and love.

"So…what are you doing here?" I ask curiously. She looks up at me, chews for a few more seconds, and then throws the chicken wing off the fire escape. I watch it fall for a bit, and then turn my attention back to my blonde-headed frenemy.

"I want you to tell me why you're acting like such a nub," Sam says bluntly.

"I am not a nub!" I shout, getting defensive. I did not go through all of these changes to still be called a nub. I am now a cool, confident, and suave teenage boy! Suave, I tell you!

"Yeah, you are! You keep acting like a jerk, and being all cocky! If that's not nubby, I don't know what is!" Sam yells, glaring at me.

"That's not fair," I cry, waving my arms around. "How come you hate me when I'm nerdy and you hate me when I'm cool?" Sam looks at me for a moment, then sighs.

"I never hated you. I just…I hate what you've become," she says. Well, that was cliché…

"What do you mean? I'm cool now. Isn't that a good thing?"

"Well, yea," she says, to which I look at her in confusion.

"Okay…I feel like I'm getting mixed signals here…"

"Okay, dork. I'm going to say this once and only once," Sam says seriously. I nod, signaling her to continue. "You are not cool. You are Freddie. You are a dorky, smart, nice, and nubby teenage boy. So stop trying to be something you're not."

"But…what if I want to change? What if I NEED to change?" I ask her, shaking my head.

"You don't need to do anything, dipwad," Sam says, looking into my eyes. I look away, and stare down at the city below. I find it amazing how there can be millions of people in the world, millions of lives being led, but the only person I can focus on is Sam. And not just because it's raining so hard my vision is hazy.

"But what if changing is the only way I can be someone? You said it yourself! I'm a stupid nub that will never be loved! I can't go back to that! I need to be somebody!" I tell her.

"Freddie…you don't need to change to be somebody. If someone can't love you for who you are, then they aren't worth it," Sam sighs. I looks down at my hands, thinking about what she just said. "Besides," Sam starts, looking down, "you have Carly now. And I know she wouldn't want you to be someone you're not."

"Yeah. I wouldn't want to upset _Carly_," I whisper sadly. What Sam doesn't know is I don't care about what Carly thinks. It's her I care about.

"Yeah," Sam sighs. After a few more seconds of silence, she suddenly stands up. "I better get back to Jake."

She walks to the window sill, and prepares to go in. But before she does, she turns back to me. "If you tell anyone I was n-n-nice to you, it will be the last thing you say," she threatens, but the tone of her voice is playful. I smirk at her, laughing lightly.

"Sir, yes sir," I joke, mock-saluting her. She scoffs, but smirks back at me.

"Later, Freddie."

"What? No Freddork? Fredwiena? Fredlame?" I ask her, laughing.

"Nope. Just Freddie," she says, shaking her head. I smile at her, and watch as she walks away, leaving a trail of water behind her.

"Bye, Sam…"

**A/N- Oooh! Now Freddie knows he can't win Sam's heart being something he's not. But there's still some problems: namely Carly and Jake. What will Freddie do to win Sam's heart? What will Sam say? And how does a random hobo fit into all of this? Find out next week on iAm Not a Nub!**

**Oh, and remember to review...OKAY, BYE!**


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